The Glorious Magnificence of Modern Handhelds

I've had a Japanese PSP since it launched late last year, but after initial marathons with Ridge Racers, Hot Shots Golf Portable and Lumines, my frothing demand for the widescreen wonder fell back down to a more manageable, healthier level. One day I'd take a crack at a lesser game like Rengoku, the next I'd fool around with iPSP to see how many movie trailers I could stuff onto a 1GB Memory Stick. A few days ago, however, Sony was nice enough to send me a package containing its U.S. PSP launch titles, and it's like I've rediscovered the handheld all over again.

Aside from Ridge Racer, the U.S. launch is all about Twisted Metal Head-On and Wipeout Pure. Great Odin's beard, these games are glorious. Of course, they aren't that different from past games, but they each represent the best their series have to offer. Playing Twisted Metal online — using a wireless handheld — is one of those rare "holy crap, the future is NOW!" moments that make video games so damn fun. I played against a couple of guys across the country on the East coast, and it didn't hurt the gameplay at all. Wireless LAN at the office has kicked all kinds of ass, too; five of us blasted each other to hell today in TM, and we had some really sweet Wipeout races, too. The games are pricey for a portable, and there are already a few clunkers, but still, this has got to be the best software lineup I've ever seen for a system launch.

Then there's the Nintendo DS. My poor, adorable DS. Actually, I dusted it off a couple days ago to give Yoshi's Touch-N-Go a whirl, and I've enjoyed it a lot. Yoshi's has a great old-school arcade feel, mixed with some new-school touch screen features that go beyond just being a gimmick to actually being fun. If Nintendo could consistently put out titles like this, Wario Ware Touched, Pac Pix and Nintendogs, then I could believe Nintendo when they call the DS a "Third Pillar" that doesn't have to compete head-to-head with PSP. But alas, for every DS gem there are at least a handful of third-party ports like Madden, Ridge Racer and Spider-Man that simply take standard games and do little to make them special (or worse, use the touch screen to make them unplayable wrecks).

And what's with the DS not going online until late this year? I'm playing PSP online right now, dammit! And Nintendo, Mario Kart had better work online, or, or... you'll have to put up with me, um, ranting on my blog. (Cough.)